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Sorry, Your Wedding Isn't Going to Go According to Plan

You've prepped and planned for months.

You've meticulously weighed every decision. You've created, and recreated (and recreated again) the perfect seating chart. You've set all of your guests up for success by pre-stamping their RSVP card AND offering them an online option! (Like, it does NOT get any easier than this, people! Why can't you just RESPOND?!)

Despite the fact that literally every.single.detail. of your day is tucked safely inside your 3-ring binder, you're still losing sleep and having nightmares that you show up hours late to your own ceremony.

Well, here's the cold, hard truth:

Something isn't going to go according to plan.

WHHHAT?! Whyyyyyy am I being so harsh?! Like, the actual nerve!

Here's the thing. Everything about your wedding relies on humans. And humans, well, humans are kind of known for screwing things up (I mean, have you Googled the climate crisis lately?)

I digress...

So, if SOMETHING about your perfectly planned, lovingly curated, wedding day is bound to go wrong, WHAT IS A GIRL TO DO?!

Hire the perfect team.

1. Vet your vendors.

Beyond seeking out artistic talent and aesthetic, it's suuuuper important that you're hiring a team of vendors who know how to pivot. You need people who can stay calm under pressure, prioritize needs, and get YOU down the aisle without any frazzled nerves.

Let me paint a picture.

Last spring, I was working with a couple who were planning their literal Dream Wedding. We're talking, glam. Huge white tent perfectly poised on the immaculate greens of a private golf club. Layers of chiffon, flowing silk, forests of greenery, sparkling chandeliers and twinkling lights, a classic black and white dance floor. The bride conjured up such a statement-making experience, and we were all SO excited to make it happen.

But here's the thing, the weekend of their wedding we endured torrential, news-making, like once-in-a-hundred-year rain. When we tried to walk into the tent the afternoon before Wedding Day, we were stopped short by huge lakes of water, pooling on top of the already-saturated ground.

It was going to be impossible to use the tent.

And so, we pivoted. And yes, it was heartbreaking- we all (very deservingly) cried.

But then, we got right to work. Because at the end of the day, this wedding was going to happen.

This marriage was going to begin.

Brian and Stacey Weddings Photography

Crystal + Wes

June 26, 2021

Planning + Coordination: The Opal Affair

After over a year of planning, incalculable amounts of time, energy, emotions, and financial resources, was this the ideal Wedding Day scenario? Of course not! But this leads us to Step Two: Let Yourself Off the Hook.

2. Let Yourself Off the Hook

When you look back at your Wedding Album on your 25th Anniversary, what sorts of emotions do you hope to remember having?

Whatever you answered, I'm guessing it wasn't any of the following: stress, anxiety, anger, frustration, or disappointment.

I know how much of yourself you put into planning a Dream Wedding Day that perfectly reflects you and your fiancé. I know that you've conjured up absolutely idyllic scenarios for what everything will look like, what it will photograph like, and ultimately, what your guests will say about it all.

But, my dear reader, please don't lose sight of this one thing. (PS: It's actually the most important part of the wedding planning process!) At the end of it all- at the end of the aisle- you get to commit to building a future with Your Person.

So let yourself off the hook. Commit to enjoying yourself, soaking in each moment, and feeling thankful for everyone gathered around you, eager to celebrate your love.

And if, after reading that, you're rolling your eyes like, "Ooooo girl, that sounds nice, but my controlling butt is going to have a hard time relaxing!" then it's time to introduce Step Three: Hire a Day of Coordinator.

3. Hire a Day of Coordinator

What the F**k is a Day of Coordinator? Go check out that post and meet me back here.

A great Day of Coordinator isn't going to necessarily be able to prevent bad things from happening on your special day, but they are going to be able to pivot and prioritize.

It takes a special breed of human to look at s**t hitting the fan and be able to move forward in a calm, calculated kind of way. A Day of Coordinator is the lifeline that a wedding needs when Hair and Makeup is running behind, the Photographer missed their turn, and your Maid of Honor needs a Band-Aid for her blister...STAT!

A Day of Coordinator takes your place as the Point of Contact on your day, so that YOU aren't constantly being bombarded with phone calls, texts, and frenzied voicemails.

Bonus Points if your Coordinator shows up with a service apron full of things like: Band Aids, Advil, Breath Mints, Scissors, a lighter, straight pins, and pen so you can sign your Marriage License. (See photo for a random, totally not self-serving in any way, example.)

"Oh, my venue already has a Coordinator!" you say? Keep in mind that a Venue Coordinator often does not coordinate anything outside of what the venue itself is actually providing.

If you have a lot of décor set-up, a bunch of outside vendors, and a handful of unique elements that aren't related to the venue, DEFINITELY make sure you have a conversation with your venue about what assistance will and will not be provided, and GET.IT.IN.WRITING.

Well, there you have it. Three tips for setting yourself up for success on your Wedding Day. So captivated by my wit and writing that you just HAVE to learn more about me, my job as a Coordinator and Planner, and the super-cool company I own? Join the Mailing List to have updates, freebies, and links dropped right into your inbox!

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